Medical Advice

She said:
darlin', you know what it's like to be a woman.
The moon is always draggin' your body around,
and it seems like something is always wrong.

I was in here last year, and the doctor said:
that's weird: your cervix is awfully close

and I thought about that all year long
and thought it must be some kind of cancer symptom
or else my uterus was fallin' out or near to that

so this year, when the doctor said: oh that's weird
I said: what do you mean, what do you mean, weird
what's wrong with my cervix? and the doctor said to me,

said, I swear to God, the doctor said: well,
well, it's not really the cervix at all, it's just

it's that your vagina is
well, it's
short.

Well. And what am I supposed to do with that information?
Get an extension?

I got to admit, it bothers me. just how short is short?
I keep wanting to ask other women,

                   and sometimes at night
I think about calling up old lovers, you know
calling up and saying: do you remember inside
a sort of brick wall effect in the back?

Darlin', this is a major problem for me.
I lie awake thinking about having a baby
and I think: what if my vagina is too short?
maybe the baby needs to be squeezed into shape
as it travels down the birth canal, and my baby
wouldn't be traveling at all, it would just pop out
like out of that big chrome toaster my momma had.

well

there's a shortage of sperm donors in my part of town anyhow
you know the men have all gone gay: there's no manly men left;
nobody wanting to be a father or love a woman

and I expect those old boyfriends think they're really hung
hitting the back wall like that every time

but I got to say I'm just tired of folks tellin' me
about my body, tired of the moon, tired of blood
and water and pains that nobody can name; darlin'

you know what it's like to be a woman?
and I said: yes I do. I know.

--- From Tackle Box
Patti White
©2002 Ashinga Press
Box 10595
Tallahassee FL 32302