Letter from Warren Buffett

I hope this information meet you well as I know you will be curious to know why/how I selected you to receive a cash sum of $5,000,000,00 USD, our information below is 100% legitimate, please see the link below: http://articles.latimes.com/2013/jul/08/business/
My wife and I decided to donate the sum of $5,000,000,00 USD to you as part of our charity project to improve the lot of 10 lucky individuals all over the world from our $12 Billion Usd I and My Wife Mapped out to help people. We prayed and searched over the internet for assistance because i saw your profile on Microsoft email owners list and picked you. Susan my wife and i have decided to make sure this is put on the internet for the world to see. Susan isn't so chipper anymore and I'm feeling a bit peckish myself and this is why I have decided to do this one thing i promised her forever. As you could see from the webpage above, I'm not getting any younger and you can imagine having not much time to live although am a Billionaire investor and we have helped some charity organizations from our Fund.
You see after taken care of the needs of our immediate family members we decided to donate the remaining of our Billions to other individuals around the world in need, the local fire department, the red cross, Haiti, hospitals and some other organizations in Asia and Europe that fight cancer, alzheimer's and diabetes and the bulk of the funds deposited with our payout bank of this charity donation. we have kept just 40% of the entire sum to our self for the remaining days.
To facilitate the payment process of the funds ($5,000,000.00 USD) which have been donated solely to you, you are to send us
your full names.................
your contact address................
your personal telephone number ...............
bank name & acct. no. .................
so that i can forward your payment information to you immediately. I am hoping that you will be able to use the money wisely and judiciously over there in your country. please you have to do you part to also alleviate the level of poverty in your region, help as many you can help once you have this money in your personal account because that is the only objective of donating this money to you in the first place.
I like to re-assure you of the legitimacy of this services as we will not be involved in any fraudulent act and will never be. use the money wisely, we only want to feel good by helping people this time of the year, this is the only thing that makes my wife happy too even now we have too much to give away. I will advise as you as the prospective lucky Person to be calm not to loose this great opportunity which millions of people are trying to entangled but the chances just couldn't come for them because a lot of people are out there to discourage them as they don't know how it works, and have never seen such before.
Thank you for accepting our offer, we are indeed grateful You Can Google my name for more information: Mr Warren Buffett.

Dear Mr. Buffet:
I can't tell you how excited we are to have you offer us such a fine gift. I have been an ardent fan of yours since I started investing in the stock market back in 1955, and although I am pleased and impressed with your generosity (and I am sorry you are sick: the newspapers have been so laggard in telling us this bad news) I still have a favor to ask of you. It's this and I am hoping you will not be put off by what I have to ask here.
I have been investing in the stock market almost as long as you, and I have spent many an hour huddled over The Wall Street Journal, Barrons, Forbes, Businessweek trying my damndest to make it in the stock market. But what I find is that when I plunk down a few hundred dollars for a favorite stock, it immediately takes a plunge. You think I am kidding, but it's been my experience for almost sixty years now. Someone says, "Buy American Express," so I dutifully plunk down part of my nest egg --- I did this back in 1958, remember? --- and then the next day, or week, or month, someone comes along and says that American Express owns some oil tanks in New Jersey only, you know, these tanks are not filled with oil, but with water, and some jerk has put in a little tube with oil in it but all around and under that little tube: nothing but water. And not even branch water. You surely remember that scandal, no?
Then a couple of years later, someone says I should buy U. S. Tobacco --- remember them? --- and then a month or so after I buy 500 shares of UST along comes the surgeon general of the United States (remember him?) and announces to the public at large that cigarettes are a known source of cancer for not only smokers but people who live in the same room or even the same house with full-time smokers. And my UST goes to zilch and I barely get out with my life.
You think this stuff only happened long ago? Well, I have news for you. Still, after all these years, after getting stiffed about a zillion times, I still have faith in America (although not American Tobacco) so last month, after watching and waiting for three count them three years, I find an obscure little stock in a paper company called Orchid (stock symbol TIS --- just like Shakespeare would have it) so I invest my last little bit in TIS (this just happened I remind you) and immediately the price drops from 33 where I got it down to 27 and since I am on margin (I'm so broke now that's the only way I can invest) and so my broker calls me, he always sounds so sad when he talks to me, he's never called me "LOSER" to my face but I know just what he is thinking and he says, "Mr. Amantea, I am very sorry to tell you this, but you remember those 100 shares of Orchid that you bought?" and I know just what he is going to say, but I don't reply, and then he says, "Well, because it fell out of bed (that's the phrase he uses) we had to --- I'm sorry to tell you this --- to close your position out because as you remember it was on margin, and ..." but as you can guess, I'm no longer listening.
My question of you Mr. Buffett, and since I trust you so much, I am going to ask you straight ... even though you might think this a little odd.
My question is this. Is there somewhere in the major stock market computers a little (what do they call them now? An "app?" Yes that is what it must be) an app that sends out a signal when I am in the very act of buying a stock that says to the world of investors everywhere: "Listen up! Five minutes ago, Carlos Amantea just bought 100 shares of Orchid Paper at 33. You know what that means: you have now been informed."
I know, it all sounds a little paranoid but please Mr. Buffett, I have to know. I figure with all your connections, you have to know the truth, and will be honest with me. I mean, now is the time for the straight skinny since I'm feeling somewhat geezery at age 81 (and neither you or I are spring chickens anymore ... just peckish old fogies.)