The New Consumer Reports

[Coming Geezer Flood Division]

To: consumerreports.org/lettertoeditor

From: Lolita Lark

Dear Friends at Consumer Reports:

I have some difficulty reading small print. With your new issue, you claim that CONSUMER REPORTS has a "more legible type font."

If you included a few duffers (like me! --- I'm available!) on your panel of experts, we could tell you that four-point type --- along with reverse white letters on black background --- are a complete washout for those of us with antique, post-cataract, watery old eyes.

Be forewarned. It is estimated that well before the end of this present century, 90% of world leaders (and the world's population) will be over ninety years of age. Juveniles such as you must learn to make things easy for those of us who have all the time in the world to bitch and moan, demanding clarity (and tax-free Depends) above all.

Remember: you'll be here with us in the land of shufflers and squinters sooner than you can possibly imagine.

--- Lolita Lark